January 2012
30 posts
December 2011
18 posts
2 tags
Today, I got a new shredder (to replace my broken one) and for the past four hours (off and on), I’ve been shredding mail, including credit card offers dated from July.
Can the USPS please just go away? Technology has given us so many gifts - MySpace, for meeting strangers on the internet for sex; Facebook, for pictures of babies and dogs; Tumblr, for girls who are not sexy in real life to...
Happy birthday to my fiancée, who woke me up this morning to tell me she had a sex dream about Tony Soprano. So, she has a (physical) type.
Dad: "What kind of wine does [fiancee] like?"
Me: "Sauvignon blanc."
Dad: "Who?"
I’m listening to a Spotify playlist called “Top 300 2011” filled with a bunch of indie rock. Let’s just say that if these songs really are the best of 2011, we have to update our list.
PEOPLE WHO HAD A ROUGH 2011:
- Sports-related child molesters
- Tyrannical dictators
- Women who hoped to marry me (but there’s still time with this one)
- Indie rock...
3 tags
(one of) six songs
“Custard Pie” Led...
“The Philadelphia Inquirer’s top investigative reporter, Nancy Phillips,...”
– (via Deadspin)
Man, I bet sports-related child molesters everywhere just can’t wait to turn the page on 2011.
I’d be willing to pay someone upwards of two million dollars to get my car’s title transferred to me, and then deal with the DMV and get the car registered and inspected in New York State. There are genital-related surgeries that I think I’d look forward to more than this car process.
OMFG DEXTER!!!
Good Thing About Being Engaged #1*: It’s 4:21pm on a Saturday and I’m expecting a big blowout night in Manhattan, yet I haven’t given a second thought to the status of my back/body hair and the potential for my toenails to kill a cockroach in a corner. I am as God intended me to be.
(This is #1 of out of 1.)
“skinny girls with no boobs did not interest me (like dating a boy) [CAREFUL]”
–
Margin notes on chapter eleven. 2:39am, Monday, December 12, 2011.
Yes, in order to avoid pissing off girls with flat chests and people who like to date boys, I should probably word that a little differently. At least me from the last edit realized this and added “[CAREFUL].”
If the...
Last night: awesome wedding between two great friends at the Please Touch Museum in Philly, an incredible venue.
This morning: shopping for wedding rings and a trash can, with a massive hangover.
This afternoon: getting the eff back to Brooklyn, because this is the third weekend in a row we’ve been in Philly. I mean, I love the city and I love cheesesteaks and all, but enough.
